My long brown…, Absinthe Front Row, Vegas Noobs, & 6 Bottles of Cognac in 1 Night
The Cast:
Dwayne (30 yr Old noob to Vegas)
Mark ( 32 yr Old celebrating birthday and also noob to Vegas)
Me (30 yr Old Army Soldier celebrating birthday)
Pre-Vegas
So I haven’t seen Dwayne or Mark in 10+ years (since high school) because of military deployments, family, yada yada so we decided…why not meet in Vegas for a reunion. Mark can be a flake sometimes...and I mean the real bad type of flake. The type of flake that will wait till the last minute to say “Uh, I’m not doing it” when he knew all along he wasn’t going to go since the mutha f***ing beginning. Not this time. Made sure everyone bought their tickets to Vegas on the same flight at the same time. You don’t come….that’s your cash and your ass. I’m coming from Atlanta and they were coming from Philly with a connecting flight in Atlanta and that’s where we were going to meet up at. Everyone put in their leave and I’m also taking 15 hours in college so I had to talk to my professors to re-arrange my Final exams. Did I mention I had to plan the whole trip since they were noobs? Armed with their cash, my cash and a shit load of MyVegas points (over 1,000,000) we were finally ready to go to Vegas.
Wednesday July 30th
Vegas baby! I’m Turnt up to the max even though I have to take three finals today. WTV. IDGAF. Scored an 86 on the first. Check. 91 on the online. One left. Time check. 2:30pm. Flight Leaves at 6:30pm 2hr ride to ATL with 1 hour through TSA and check-in. Everything is turning out great. That’s when my Astronomy prof unloads a 78 question Open-ended test on my ass. Scored a 67. WTV Bia…I’m headed to Vegas. Look at the clock. 4:30pm. FAWK!!! I just got a speeding ticket 2 days ago (80 in a 55) so I’m shook of the cops giving me another one. F*** it…I’m headed to Vegas. 90-95 MPH the whole way and not a cop on the road. I hop out with 21 minutes till the flight leaves. Check in through Southwest. The lady who checked me in said “Sir you won’t make the Flight”. Shit. I then started begging like the basehead from Menace II Society and she was O-Dog. “Come on lady….I got my friends on that flight…Vegas…please…come on”. She finally said “allright but your bags won’t make it”. Cool….IDGAF. I’m headed to Vegas.
Go through TSA sort of quickly thanks to my Government ID but friends calling asking where I’m at as I go through the checkpoint doesn’t help. Done….and I’m hauling ass in dress shoes with a carry on in my arms. All of a sudden I hear….”Mr. (Army Vegas), If you are in the airport please hurry to the gate D2. (maybe B2…all I know that shit was at the very end of the terminal) We will close the doors in 2 minutes. Your friends are waiting. Thank you.” I Usain Bolt my ass down to the doors and the flight attendant says “You have good friends…They held the plane for you”. Nice. Say what’s up to my bros and board the plane. Since we were the last one’s on we all got sit up front. Nice. Sat next to a lady who cooked for 4 U.S. presidents and an airplane pilot.
Got off the plane and Presidential Limo was waiting for us in our stretch Escalade with our bottle. Took us for a tour of the strip and Fremont and since I forgot my $100’s for a sandwich for Aria he took us to a liquor store. Cool. We can load up here. ATM only dispersed $20’s so I got $200 worth for the sandwich. I already had a bottle of Hennessy Pure White from Costa Rica so we bought 2 bottles of D’usse and the cashier said the bottle looked so cool if we bring them back she would give us $20. Nah..i’m good. Got my cognac and we are headed to Aria.
Hit the check-in line around 9:30pm and no one is in line. Young female calls me and says “Sir, I can help you right here” Yes. You. Can. Easily a strong 8. She asks for my name to look up the reservation and ID along with form of payment and I hand her the $200 sandwiched in between my ID and Credit Card. “Is there any upgrades you can give me?” She said hold on and then denied me. WTF do I need to tip…$500? Checked in the room and Mark and Dwayne were tired. They wanted sleep I said Hell to the nooooooo. This is Vegas. But they convinced me that the sleep they were going to get tonight meant they were going to go hard for the rest of the 6 days we were going to be there for. O.K…I’ll bite…sleep it is…but tomorrow you better hit the ground fucking running…. To be Continued…
The Cast:
Dwayne (30 yr Old noob to Vegas)
Mark ( 32 yr Old celebrating birthday and also noob to Vegas)
Me (30 yr Old Army Soldier celebrating birthday)
Pre-Vegas
So I haven’t seen Dwayne or Mark in 10+ years (since high school) because of military deployments, family, yada yada so we decided…why not meet in Vegas for a reunion. Mark can be a flake sometimes...and I mean the real bad type of flake. The type of flake that will wait till the last minute to say “Uh, I’m not doing it” when he knew all along he wasn’t going to go since the mutha f***ing beginning. Not this time. Made sure everyone bought their tickets to Vegas on the same flight at the same time. You don’t come….that’s your cash and your ass. I’m coming from Atlanta and they were coming from Philly with a connecting flight in Atlanta and that’s where we were going to meet up at. Everyone put in their leave and I’m also taking 15 hours in college so I had to talk to my professors to re-arrange my Final exams. Did I mention I had to plan the whole trip since they were noobs? Armed with their cash, my cash and a shit load of MyVegas points (over 1,000,000) we were finally ready to go to Vegas.
Wednesday July 30th
Vegas baby! I’m Turnt up to the max even though I have to take three finals today. WTV. IDGAF. Scored an 86 on the first. Check. 91 on the online. One left. Time check. 2:30pm. Flight Leaves at 6:30pm 2hr ride to ATL with 1 hour through TSA and check-in. Everything is turning out great. That’s when my Astronomy prof unloads a 78 question Open-ended test on my ass. Scored a 67. WTV Bia…I’m headed to Vegas. Look at the clock. 4:30pm. FAWK!!! I just got a speeding ticket 2 days ago (80 in a 55) so I’m shook of the cops giving me another one. F*** it…I’m headed to Vegas. 90-95 MPH the whole way and not a cop on the road. I hop out with 21 minutes till the flight leaves. Check in through Southwest. The lady who checked me in said “Sir you won’t make the Flight”. Shit. I then started begging like the basehead from Menace II Society and she was O-Dog. “Come on lady….I got my friends on that flight…Vegas…please…come on”. She finally said “allright but your bags won’t make it”. Cool….IDGAF. I’m headed to Vegas.
Go through TSA sort of quickly thanks to my Government ID but friends calling asking where I’m at as I go through the checkpoint doesn’t help. Done….and I’m hauling ass in dress shoes with a carry on in my arms. All of a sudden I hear….”Mr. (Army Vegas), If you are in the airport please hurry to the gate D2. (maybe B2…all I know that shit was at the very end of the terminal) We will close the doors in 2 minutes. Your friends are waiting. Thank you.” I Usain Bolt my ass down to the doors and the flight attendant says “You have good friends…They held the plane for you”. Nice. Say what’s up to my bros and board the plane. Since we were the last one’s on we all got sit up front. Nice. Sat next to a lady who cooked for 4 U.S. presidents and an airplane pilot.
Got off the plane and Presidential Limo was waiting for us in our stretch Escalade with our bottle. Took us for a tour of the strip and Fremont and since I forgot my $100’s for a sandwich for Aria he took us to a liquor store. Cool. We can load up here. ATM only dispersed $20’s so I got $200 worth for the sandwich. I already had a bottle of Hennessy Pure White from Costa Rica so we bought 2 bottles of D’usse and the cashier said the bottle looked so cool if we bring them back she would give us $20. Nah..i’m good. Got my cognac and we are headed to Aria.
Hit the check-in line around 9:30pm and no one is in line. Young female calls me and says “Sir, I can help you right here” Yes. You. Can. Easily a strong 8. She asks for my name to look up the reservation and ID along with form of payment and I hand her the $200 sandwiched in between my ID and Credit Card. “Is there any upgrades you can give me?” She said hold on and then denied me. WTF do I need to tip…$500? Checked in the room and Mark and Dwayne were tired. They wanted sleep I said Hell to the nooooooo. This is Vegas. But they convinced me that the sleep they were going to get tonight meant they were going to go hard for the rest of the 6 days we were going to be there for. O.K…I’ll bite…sleep it is…but tomorrow you better hit the ground fucking running…. To be Continued…
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