Vegas Trip Report - July 2009

[nel167]

I typically write trip reports amongst my friends and share to only those closest. Being new to this board I have been inspired by this board to share periodically part of my report. It is pretty long in nature so I will just post this in pieces and I have edited accordingly and changed the names of parties involved to protect the guilty.


Thursday July 23rd

12:15 - I arrive at the gate from the rapids just in time for last call to the gate. I being lazy and not selecting my seat get one in the far back but luckily the two people in my seat left. Next thing you know I have the whole row to myself. I spent the flight drinking Jack and Cokes and listening to Pit bull – “I know you want me”.

1:56 – Arrive in Vegas early while await the arrival of Ryan@2:30. I trade phone calls back and forth with Scott for a pickup and by 3:15 we are all together.

4:00 – We go to Chinatown my first time there lots of cool restaurants and my fav. “Massage parlours”. We grab food at this Thai/Chinese place and by the way the two should never be mixed. Got some pat thai and salt baked squid with some Tsing Tao and I’m ready to go. We make our way to the Bellagio so Scott can check in while my eyes our glued to this Asian chick’s butt.

4:35 – We decide between the three of us to pool $50 and see if we can go on a run but that lasted about 4 hands in Pai Gow. Down $50 off the bat so I make my way to the blackjack table and order a Heineken. I am talking to Scott about the pool $ and the dealer says “Are you playing or going to sit there and talk with your friend” mind you not I had not even put any money on the table so I said talk to my friend. She asks me how old I am so I tell her 13 what a c-u-n you know the rest. After awhile I got tired of her act and asked her when her shift was over. She finally left and miraculously I started winning for a while. I eventually lose a couple buy-ins and we decided to check into our hotel at Caesars. I must say one of my new favorite hotels our bathroom had a red light in it with a bath tub. I donned it the red light special room. After losing $60 at single deck blackjack and talking to a hot Slovenian school teacher from Sacramento who says “Cleveland is a great city”. I was confused maybe she was referring to Cleveland, Alabama?
6:00 – Scott, Ryan, and I walk the strip towards the M&M factory area. A high school basketball tournament was going on this weekend and I’ll be damned if I was not surrounded by kids wearing wife beaters, long shorts, high socks and sandals.
8 – Midnight – Nothing to exciting happens here except playing poker at the MGM with a table full of poker tools. I drink about 9 crown and cokes and break even at the table but I think the crown and cokes made up for it. Ryan and I decided to walk back to the Caesars as tonight is his birthday and we must celebrate it properly little did I know what a pain in the ass it would be.


Strip Clubs

12:45: We get ready and hop a cab and I am excited to break his cherry with his first Vegas Strip club and the Spearmint Rhino was on the agenda. The cabbie tried to hock Sapphire to us but I asked him if he could get my buddies covered paid for and he said he’ll do what he can. What a worthless piece of shit didn’t do a damn piece of negotiating with the door guy. I ask the door guy if he can comp my buddies cover since it was his birthday and I’ll pay my own way in. He makes some smart ass comment and I proceed to pay the cover when I am surprised with its $50 for your two free drinks. Nelly’s thoughts “Bitch how the hell is that two drinks free when I’m paying for that shit up front.” I say the door says $30 and now you’re trying to bait and switch me for $50 I of course get the full customer service of get the hell out of line – next. I flick her off mentally in my head and do a crotch grab to the door guy. Unfortunately I have to get back into the same cab with the same shitty driver. I should’ve told the guy Rick’s cabaret but my mouth said “How’s Sapphire?” We arrive there and he gives us this “free drink ticket” which I later learned is worthless. The place was back and I was very impressed with the setup. This time no tricky $30 +20 drinks just the straight $30 and the door guy said someone will seat you little did I know he throws us right into the fire when these two strippers while extremely hot were extremely annoying. They attempt to lead us to the VIP room for a table since the main floor was full and I said hey how about you skanks walk us to the bar and we’ll get a drink. We head over to the bar and these girls are like attached to us at the hip and of course our “two free drink tickets” turn into a beer for us and them ordering a drink on their own behalf. Of course a shitty vodka tonic runs $16 but whatever it’s Vegas. These girls keep on pitching the awesome VIP room - $260 for 30 mins. 3 for $100 or $400 for an hour in my head I’m thinking unless something gets pulled out back there I’ll save my money on better things. I tell her she’s a good salesman but I’m just not buying what she’s selling after 10 minutes of this they finally get the hint. So far we’ve spent about $46 a piece and have nothing to show for it. I think the most annoying so far was we couldn’t even get a tableside dance for $20 almost like it was an insult for these chicks.
2am – We walk around the place and it’s a great setup and I can’t believe all the tables on the main floor are packed. We walk around and order another round of $12 Budweiser. Another stripper comes by this one looks like a combo between Daisy DeLaHoya and Pamela Anderson definitely caught my interest. She has some tattoo across her chest which looked amazing and she goes on and on about being a tattoo model. I think after this past weekend I learned that in general women don’t really have anything interesting to talk about I just did a lot of nodding and smiling. After some 10 minutes of negotiating I said to her the most I would do here is 3 for $100 plus the two drinks I have to buy (It seems like in Vegas everything has to be a package and a last second $20 tip to everyone). We get back there and this story actually is only staying in between these ears but I will say that we did some more negotiating and I got some goodies from her.

230 am – bed: We had enough of this place and head back to the hotel. Ryan is calling it a night yet I feel the need to do more foul shit. I walk over towards the Flamingo/O’sheas area for some late night poker. There wasn’t anything going on at the Flamingo so I cautiously venture towards O’sheas. A word of warning to all who read this when walking this part of the strip make no eye contact with anyone, keep your head down and run to your target. I know it gets crazy around 3am but god damn I can’t even describe to you what I saw on that little block of sidewalk. Luckily the LVPD patty wagon was sitting outside of O’sheas. If you’ve never been to O’sheas real classy place to say the least with the open poker table and drunks at the 24 hour happy hour bar. It’s about 3am and I sit down at the poker game and proceed to lose it very quickly in a couple of hands thanks to the evil poker gods. I finish my corona and decide to call it a night at about 3:30am. Gambling losses -$350, miscellaneous cost - $290.
Lessons Learned from Thursday:
- Free alcohol is awesome
- Drunk and frisky chicks live and breathe at O’Sheas especially at 3am every night!
- Chinatown in Vegas was cool
- Strip clubs there are scams and learn to find ways to scam them
- Girls with big boobs rock

[nel167]

Friday July 24th

7am – 10am: I should have just called it a continuation from the night before as I get the Vegas itch and am back up about 7am after tossing and turning for awhile. A little gun shy after the beating I took at blackjack but ready to go since I have to prepare for the arrival of Booze at 8am. I put my helmet on and handicap sticker ready in preparation. Ryan and I head downstairs to walk around and I decide to sit at the Pai Gow table. I sit down with this guy from NY who for some reason brought his GF. I start sucking down red bulls and was winning for a bit then of course catch a cold run of cards and bleed to my final $35. Booze arrives drunk already from the plane at 8:30am. Background on Booze college friend who I has been on my shit list for awhile and this trip did not make it any better. He changes and I decide to hit up the breakfast buffet at Paris which my favorite breakfast buffet in the city. Ryan and I enjoy the breakfast but I am full after my crepes and waffles while Booze is being booze.

11am – 1pm: We find him at Bally’s a couple hours later and I decide to hit the 11am poker tournament. Lose my money there but at least I got my $60 corona to be thankful for. Disgusted with gambling I meet Booze at Bill’s gambling hall with red bull and vodka in hand. Booze is drinking the $1 drafts and margaritas BTW not a good mixing combination unless you want to make yourself sick. It’s about 1pm so I hit up Scott who had a rough night at the tables as well and decide to meet him at Caesar’s pool. Ryan is still in the tournament and doing well.

Pool
1pm-4pm: I throw on the Speedos (J/K) though I was looking for some earlier this summer. Booze and I hit the pool though weather was cloudy and shitty the skimpy bikinis and girls were out in full force. Me and booze make our rounds hitting on everything with two legs with mojitos in hand. First we talk to these two chicks one from San Diego and the other San Francisco but they have this BF/fiancé problem I tried to tell them we were the solution but they kept going on about them. We then wander off to this daybed with this bachelorette party and proceed to feed get fed fruit. I’m thinking this is what life is all about. We were talking to these chicks sitting next to us and Booze attempts to use the Wasted Space place to meet up however it helps if the girls actually know the place. Ryan and Scott show up and we thought since it was free it would be a good idea to check out Venus the topless pool. The boobs were very nice in there yet the atmosphere sucked. Thought I was at the topless country club pool with bad music and pretentious people. After a drink we go to the main pool and we find another pool off to the side and tell Booze to use the sex and electronics line which was $$$$. There were about 7 chicks and of course it was a bachelorette party – weird everywhere I looked was another one. Anyways these chicks were from South Carolina and somewhere else but I didn’t pay attention but it was all the same to me. I told the bachelorette if she was lucky I would give her a lap dance tonight but expect big tips. For some reason instead of working on the extremely hot chicks booze goes after the nastiest, fattest, pastiest white girl out of all of them. They proceed to make out in the corner while I proceed to vomit in my mouth. I attempt to refocus and distract the friends and after awhile suggest they meet us out tonight at Wasted Space at the Hard Rock hotel. Side note never ask girls to go to a bar they never heard of in Vegas it is just a waste of energy.

Would you hit a 16?
4pm: I tell Booze that I’m heading back to the room with Ryan and Scott as he does god knows what with the baby rhino. We get to the room and chill for a bit and of course little did I know National Geographic was filming a scene of the mating habits of the wildebeest. Without even a heads up they bust into the room and she’s already half naked so of course everyone scatters out of the room and I’m thinking fuck that I’m showering first. Right in the middle of the shower Booze bust in and says “hey you have any condoms?” I say yes asshole let me finish showering first. I towel off and I see her sprawled out on the bed thinking these things:
1.) “I got next”
2.) We need to burn those sheets
3.) In blackjack I would consider her a 16 against a 10 showing for the dealer. Do I really want to hit it? (Thanks Dave for that line)
I get dressed throw the condom over my shoulder and attempt to get the visual image out of my head. I walk to the Flamingo and text him that he has 45 minutes and then I’m coming back in. I meet up with Scott and Ryan and we just walk around the strip for a bit before we grab some dinner. I meet up Booze AKA Number One Scummy and we decide to go to the Rio for the seafood buffet.

7pm: We head over to the Rio and since I told everyone the buffet was $40 but they insisted it was $30 when we were told it was $40 everyone got turned off. We make our way to the world buffet - $25 which really sucked. After some shitty crab legs and prime rib I was ready for a brief nap before we go out. We head back to the room about 9ish and pass out until its time to get ready.

10pm: After an awesome 30 minute power nap and I am ready to go. Throw on the Armani Jeans, wife beater and white shirt and I’m ready for Wasted Space. I texted The Rock and as far as I know he may be on the moon. He says he’ll get there late as he just checked in so me, Ryan and Booze walk around for awhile to look for a cab. The strip is just crazy packed and people everywhere. We finally got a cab walking from Caesars to the Harley Davidson café and even when we got in we were stuck in the construction on Las Vegas Blvd.

Wasted Space & Bachelorette Party #3
11pm - ??? We finally arrive at about 11pm and check in with Rocco (former limo drive) who is a VIP Host at the Hard Rock. One of the funniest things I heard all trip came from the bouncer who looked at Booze’s military I.D. and said “Holy shit it’s McLovin”. I shook his hand and said thank you for providing us hours of entertainment for the evening. Once I looked at Booze’s current haircut I started introducing him as my friend from Hawaii with no last name.

We get seated at our table and let The Rock know we got here but in the mean time we had to settle on the bill which amazingly I’m dishing out an extra $150 for the bill (Emotional state: Mangry). I said fuck it and lets start drinking we got 2 bottles and one was free so we went with Grey Goose and Sky…yea I know wasn’t my first choice either. We had OJ, tonic, and cranberry as mixers. We checked the place out nice little chill place not typically my cup of tea but with all the alcohol it didn’t bother me too much. We scope the place out and the waitress said she’ll bring us some company and Rocco said the same. Sure as shit 15 minutes later and we got nothing so after my 4th drink I decide to roll up the sleeves and get to work since no one else on the team is making any plays. I hit the dance floor and lock in on this Asian chick in a veil and all I said was you, me and your friends drink now. I roll back to the table with about 10 chicks not a bad ratio for the evening 10 girls 3 guys. Now I feel like a host as I am trying to entertain all the girls as my boy Ryan doesn’t say much and Booze was my co-pilot. All the chicks are from all over the country and from smart colleges and in fact I met the hottest Java Developer with nice legs in the country. She said something about boyfriend but I stopped listening after I saw her chest. After a while of story telling I decide its time to give the bachelorette a gift. I take her by the hand and throw her on the couch and pull the Chicago move. I start doing a little dance and straddle her like the pros do and give her a dance that could only be described as Awesome. All of a sudden as I am half naked I see the flashes go off behind me thinking uh oh not sure where those pictures are going to end up. The bachelorette had a smile on her face ear to ear and I only asked her for a small tip . There was about 4 Asian chicks bachelorette included 2 black chicks and the rest white girls. I take one of the black chicks and we had a little dance off. I did a little butterfly with a splash of Billy Jean. We start doing a little bump and grind and I explore her like the great Christopher Columbus did to America. We polished off 1 and ½ bottles and the girls wanted to go to a bigger dance club Studio 54. If it wasn’t for the last of the alcohol we would’ve been aboard the band wagon. We exchanged numbers with the ladies and let her know there will be an after party in our room. This is where things start getting a little fuzzy for me not the first or last time I will say this. Oh BTW The Rock blew us off on Friday night but made up for it on Saturday. We start crushing vodka tonics and I don’t know how it started or where these girls came from but these two Latino chicks join us. I don’t even know what we were talking about but I’m rubbing her down all over the couch and she keeps rambling on about her ex-bf so I just kept feeding her drinks. The girls disappeared just as fast as they showed up. At this point alcohol has taken over and I am just going through the motions. We finished the bottle and attempted to locate them in the casino floor but to no avail. We make it to the room and rack out for the night.

Lessons Learned from Friday:
- Bring camera
- Make people sign waivers before taking pictures
- I should dance professionally
- Too much vodka = sloppy
- Massages are good

[nel167]

Here is my report for day 3 of the trip:

Saturday July 25th
9am – I think that is what time I woke up with less of a hangover than I expected thank you Vodka. I head downstairs to grab some coffee immediately. Booze and I then head to the pool to open the pores up a little bit. We run into this Stefanie chick from Chicago who seemed to be attached to us like glue the whole weekend like a lost little puppy. We run into the baby rhino and her friends I begin to think how hot the bachelorette is in this party and she keeps on giving me the eye like she has yellow fever.

11am – 1pm: Anyways we decide to freshen up as we are supposed to meet with Booze’s friends at the Tropicana as I will only refer to as “the scummies”. I told Booze the day before we would have a race with ordering the tall margaritas and see who can drink them the fastest down the strip and the winner will either become more dehydrated, brain freeze or both. No margaritas but we decide on these other alcoholic concoctions. We make our way to El Diablo’s since I hear that food is good especially when you never stop drinking. I found this drink in Maxim that sounded pretty good so I had our waiter go make it for me and for some reason I couldn’t eat the food in front of me I just looked at it funny. We finish brunch and make our way to the Tropicana.

12-6pm: We settle in by the pool and after Caesars it does not make this place the most appealing although there was this blonde with a body to die for. Booze got one of the Latino chick’s numbers last night and they are planning on meeting us here. They show up and god damn the one chick I was massaging Ruby was even hotter than I thought. Give myself a self high five and they said they were going to get some food and come back but nonetheless the last time we would see them. Booze’s friends finally show up it was like a build up for a summer blockbuster only to be disappointed with Star Wars Episode I. I brought the captain hat today and let the boys wear it and try to be a good wingman for Ivan. Booze was messing around with the one chick the whole day. Nothing real memorable about the pool during the day except for volleyball and alcohol and the distinct smell of bleach everywhere. The day goes into the evening and Booze ask me to blow off the reservations we had at Tao @ 7 which I think was a big mistake now looking back.

7pm – What I can remember: We walk back to Caesars and get dressed flossing my new suit and the girls meet us up dolled up. I bought a bottle of vodka for some house drinks and we then proceed to play some truth or dare and spin the bottle. I get the one chick to go streaking down our hallway which was funny in itself and spin the bottle speaks for itself. At this point its about 8pm and we decide to get some food and yea great idea when you don’t have reservations anywhere to find a place to eat. We walk around for a while until we come across this Japanese restaurant and I have to negotiate with the hostess for our party of 8. She attempts to pull some bullshit that we have to order off one side of the menu so I just order the cheapest thing I can find. The food wasn’t bad but could’ve been better. We finish dinner and our game plan was to hit up Pure in our hotel but mother of god the line was outrageous as we think DMX was playing here that night. We run into that Stefanie chick again and told that our passes we had were no good because it was too late like WTF? Anyways I finally run into The Rock and he is pimped up with his two friends one of them Sam who was dressed in leopard skin. She must know my weakness and I introduce as we were texting back and forth the night before. The Rock and I decide to check out the line at the bank to see if it was any better and it wasn’t of course. On our way back to Caesars I see these 7 smoking hot Asian chicks The Rock says they were Latino but who knows. I attempt to get them to kick it with the cool kids but The Rock thinks they were underage. It helps to have a sober voice of reason when you’ve been drinking 2.5 days straight. We meet up with the group at which point there are 10 of us and decide we’re not getting in here so Booze calls Rocco and before you know it we’re back at Wasted Space at the same exact table. I recall a limo ride on the way there. The last thing I remember was pouring myself a drink then many hours later getting kicked out by security for being too drunk…please mark this one in the books as another first. Getting kicked out of a bar in Vegas for being too drunk. I will be looking for others on the trip to back fill this night.

Lessons learned from Saturday:
- Drinking for 12 hours generally means bad things in all shapes and forms
- I love Vegas
- It’s amazing what you can get someone to do with a little motivation and alcohol
- I never want to leave this place

[YellowandNavy]

Great TR. Regarding to your strip club experience you can always call the strip club and ask for free limo/cover. If you go to their website you will see every single one of them has that option. When I'm in Vegas I never take a cab to strip club, i always did the free limo pick up. And strip joint wants you to arrive with the house limo so they will comp your entry.

[nel167]

Thanks for the tip I absolutely learned my lesson that evening in fact every time I go to a LV strip club I seem to learn from a big mistake I made that night LOL. Anyways here is day 4 for those interested:

Sunday July 26th

???- Midnight:

Rehab party
I think its Sunday as I crawl out of bed and its about 9am. Booze and the one chick destroyed our bathroom. We make our way to McDonalds for some quick food before another long day this time “The Rehab Party” at the Hard Rock. I call The Rock but that fucker is still sleeping I mean what are you doing its Vegas you can sleep at home. We head over to the Hard Rock and I where we are meeting Reed and I hear that our buddy Chase and his friend are coming in from Phoenix. We bypass the line after paying our cover and our led into Rehab. The sight itself is breathtaking and the crowd is insane. We make camp which I will later regret next to these chicks from Toronto my new favorite city. These girls are tall, skinny and hot. I told them I love their city and their gravy fries. We wander around and see DMX doing shots at the bar I just stared for a minute and didn’t want to be that guy running for his camera he looks a lot shorter in person. After hours and hours of drinking and doing a little stardust I realize its almost late afternoon. We all go gather our shit and of course my phone is no where to be found so I start flipping out yelling at all the worthless security staff standing around and so I go inside and start yelling at the front desk, concierge and then security console desk who seemed to have the education of a 5th grader. I filed my own police report and stormed back to our room to deactivate the phone. At this time it was about 6pm and boom the alcohol caught up to me and I was out like a light. I awaken to realize its midnight and no better feeling than to wake up at midnight to start going out.

Midnight – Morning:
We start getting ready and I hear a knock on the door and it’s the lost puppy Stefanie from Chicago. After we grab some food at Burger King the 3 of us make our way back to the Hard Rock to Body English for the naughty school girl night– damn you Hard Rock Hotel! We get to the rope and because Stefanie decides she didn’t want to pay for the cover we didn’t go in. We grab a beer at the center and I look around and basically think this place sucks. Chase and Paul meet us up there for a beer before we decide to go to Bank at the Bellagio AKA my new home. We get to the bank and of course the cover charge is still $30 but not sure how that changed from the other club. Mental note I never saw this Stefanie chick’s friends the whole weekend. I’ll admit I was a bit sloppy the past 24 hours but I sure as hell was not going to waste my last night in Vegas.

The Bank
2am: We pay the cover and at this point my credit card strip is worn out after all the $$$ I blew this weekend. I go to the bar and order a Corona…yum a delicious $10 beer. I put my game face on and start talking to every girl I see. I channel my college years and decide to go fat first. Build the mojo up a bit and work my way down the bar to these two chicks against the rail. I ask them why they look so bored and we’re their boyfriends were at and sure enough the guy was behind me. I gave him a high five and said if he waited 5 more minutes they would’ve been with me. I then go to the other side of the bar where I see this middle age chick and she of course is by herself, a local and sober…. Hmmm only means one thing D.T.F. I start teasing her a bit and she’s locked in on me and I’m thinking i may be balls deep in this broad soon. She excuses herself to the bathroom and Paul comes running over and says dude I was trying to give you the signal to walk away but WTF I’m saturated from alcohol and ready to get into shit. I guess I heeded his advice and walk around with my corona and start doing a little hip thrust towards the direction of this lovely young brunette. Within seconds we are literally nose to nose and we look deep into each others eyes like it was a magnet. I introduce myself and visa versa when all of a sudden I feel this hand on my shoulder and I turn a bit and it’s her hot, taller brunette friend. She says to me in her Paris Hilton voice “You can’t have my BFF tonight she’s all mine”. I feel this hand running down my shoulder and my shirt being unbutton and I all I feel is her tongue up and down my neck while the other one starts making out with me. I just wanted to say that getting molested by two chicks at the same time in the middle of the club is AWESOME and highly recommend everyone doing it at least every night they go out. After about 5 minutes of this we come up for air and I am just tingling she says that she’s here celebrating her friends birthday with 5 of her other friends. This is where that god damn cell phone screwed me. I obviously didn’t have it nor a pen and paper. I told her that to hit her friends up and find me later so we can continue this. I am feeling very good as I had Paul witness this whole thing yet feeling my body shaking grab another beer. He said something about Chase and Booze getting a limo and champagne for the night which sounded like a great idea. I use the bathroom to cool off and as I walk out the cougar pounces on me like I was a gazelle. I’m thinking shit she’s going to be on me all night now this is where I could have used a good wingman as my lack of cell phone and panic I could have made a wiser choice. I told her that I have to find my friends but to write her number down so we could hook up later. I think I should’ve just taken her in the back and done the deed then move to the other chicks. I grab her number and was honestly looking for the fuckers who left me there. I coaxed the drink girl to give me a free shot while I searched for the two chicks from Cali. After 20 mins or so I retreated from the club. Little did I know this was only the start of the night.

3amish - 9am: I think it was about 3am or so and I finally get a hold of those assholes and they are back at Caesars lounge bar. I walk out in front of the Bellagio and I look behind me and of course the first hooker I see the whole trip. She was wearing all white cut off little shirt, short skirt and high heels and just looking to be pounded on. She ask me do I want to get my fuck on tonight and of course easy answer was yes. Unfortunately my bankroll was so depleted that I couldn’t even get to her asking price. I went old skool again and ask her to put her number down while I attempt to win some $$$ at the tables. I miss my cell phone every second this occurs and I continue walking and within a couple more mins I run into two new chicks. These ones are Eastern European and from Cleveland… sweet I go all the way out to Vegas to hang out with chicks from Cleveland with an attitude. We walk arm and arm as I tell them we may be getting a limo all night and to cruise around. Some Aussie attempts to steal the girls from me but I tell him sorry sir I’m still on this set you can find another machine. I walk into the casino only to find these guys just sitting around at the bar lounge half-ass talking to these two other girls. My irritation and frustration level is high as I could’ve been balls deep in Valley girls from California. They say they aren’t getting a limo and I feel like I’m with the Cleveland Browns lots of potential but at the end of the day just a bunch of empty promises. The one chick has to use the restroom so I said I’ll show her the way. I said the one in my room is much nicer and let her checkout the room. She goes into the room and scopes it out and likes what she sees and gives me my feet hurt line. I naturally say well luckily I’m an expert in the art of foot rubs. Unfortunately she wasn’t having it so I said freshen up and grab a drink maybe that will change your mind later . We go downstairs and I try to teach her how to play blackjack. I swear it was like watching a monkey hump a football just painful. She loses a couple of hands and gets mad that I am giving her advice so instead of cussing her off I just turn around walk away and slam a shot of tequila at the bar. I go back to the room and make another delicious strawberry Gatorade and vodka and find a blackjack table. I put a $100 on the table and proceed to go on a run and this is by far the most fun I had at a table on the trip. I was gambling with a Middle Eastern family who was gambling $500-1k a hand like it was going out of style. I felt somewhat like a baller with my $25 chips. I saw the dude make huge double down bets for like $2k and mind you not this is just a $10 minimum table. He starts dancing and screaming when he hits and I told him to buy me breakfast in the morning. I have this fortress of drinks in front of me: Gatorade & Vodka, Vodka/Tonic, Bloody Mary, patron and 3 little waters. After 3-4 hours of this and getting up to BS with the Cleveland Browns aka my lame friends. I only make about a $100 profit at the tables. It is about 9am and I of course ask for a late checkout of noon. I stumble back in the room and somewhat prepare to back my stuff. I lay in the bed for a couple hours and of course am awaking by the guys who never even slept.

Lessons Learned from Sunday:
- Fuck the Hard Rock Hotel
- I love thongs
- Being molested by two girls is great
- I miss my cell phone
- Strawberry Gatorade and vodkas are delicious
- My body can take a beating and keep on ticking
- Cougars are hungry
- Sleep is overrated
- Free shots are cool
- I need better wingmen
- I love gambling
- I love alcohol
- Stefanie from Chicago was hot but really weird

[nel167]

Day 4

Monday July 27th
11am-5pm: This is just a continuation from last night/morning. The guys come stumbling in as well as Ryan. I give Ryan a recap of how I’m still alive. Booze decides it’s a good idea to stay another day even though he’s on negative debit. I thought about it for a second but my body said get your ass home. I feel like death twice rolled over and the fact that it is 109 degrees doesn’t help. We checkout via the TV which was cool and dump my stuff to the bellhop before my flight at 4:45pm. I decide that some fresh air and pool may help… nope. The water is so hot and too hot to lay out that I feel like a Mexican jumping bean. This 50 y/o chick from Montreal comes by and starts BS’ing with us and I’m thinking what the hell I’m bored so I start flirting with her. I just mention she looks young for her age and how I have a thing for older women. I tell her that my phone is lost and that I am leaving soon. She says she’s meeting her friends in a bit and I tell her to stay out of trouble and she says “Fuck it I’m old I’ll do anything”. I’ll leave it at that as any further details can be incriminating. I end up getting some lunch from Chinatown and catching my flight. Somehow I check into the flight and get bumped up to first class. Thank god because these kids from the high school basketball tournament were on our flight. Annoying was an understatement. I got sick on the plane, drank some water and had another cocktail and was back home by 1am. I was curled in a little ball for the whole next day reflecting on such an epic trip that was Vegas 2009.

That pretty much wraps up my weekend journey in Vegas hopefully it wasn't too boring. I will be out in Vegas for Super Bowl weekend 2011 and hope to top this trip. I plan on having a running TR of my hourly debauchery. Hope to see you at the tables and I'll end it with a what happens in Vegas stay in the forums.

Cheers,


Nelson

[xostacylee]

Ahhh, I love O'Sheas. But I agree with the shadiness of that part of the strip. We used to stay at the Flamingo all the time, but last year these guys were hassling me and my girl friend (when we were with her guy friends!), which ended up in a HUGE fight with the police and everything (her guy friend beat the living crap out of the 2 guys hassling us, to the point where he was arrested for felony battery!). No fun. I learned my lesson that night. Needless to say we upgraded hotels too.