A Cancelled Flight, Counterfeit Limos, and a Brazilian Girl with an EXCELLENT memory.

[Brooklyn Marc]

I like the porn name cinnamon bun.. but you clearly need a ridiculous safe word. And I'm learning a lot here.. there's a porn site called x hamster??

Yeah what can I say I know a few sites... weird name but pretty good I guess

[ratchelor]

Good thing you didn't have another few shots and black out or something.

[dnix]

I really thought Marc was making a joke when he said X Hamster. lol

[SuZQ]

If I'm ever in the market for a rodent pet, I will remember not to click that site.

[Tara Denise]

Umm....I've definitely heard of xhamster...lol I think I hang out with too many heathens.

[JonnyB29]

This was so worth the wait. I walked into a couple of friends of mine doing this with some random they met in Vegas. NOT with the whips and chains, but I can't look them in the eye to this day without chuckling!

Can't wait for the next part, keep it coming, it's great so far!

Cheers,

[wat]

Lesson learned: never go back to a hotel room with 2 strangers you've met in Vegas.

... unless they're both female?

[Gumbo_Techno]

... unless they're both female?

after my previous experience.. I honestly don't know.

[SuZQ]

Are you done?? Or is there more?

[ecook0808]

Good try on the Derek Jeter analogy... He's not a switch hitter in either sense of the term.

[Gumbo_Techno]

Typing it up as we speak SuzQ

Edit: it's coming. Trying to juggle working night shift and day 2 of the TR.

[Gumbo_Techno]

Friday, August 30th
I wake up that morning at around 9 AM to the sound of my door slamming. What the hell? I'm the only one staying in here. I jump out of bed, reach down and grab a hold of the nearest weapon I can get my hands on...a dress shoe. I slowly start creeping towards the front of the room as if I'm auditioning for the next James Bond flick. I dart around the corner..nothing. I flick the bathroom light on and cock back..nothing. Slide open the closet door with everything in me.. Nothing. Hm. Maybe I was hearing shit? I open up the hotel room door, step out (in just my boxers, mind you), and I see a somewhat shocked housekeeper standing in front of the room across from me. "I'm so sorry sir! I didn't mean to wake you up!" she says. Apparently I forgot to lock my door and put up the do not disturb sign before I went to bed. Silly me. Poor lady for having to see me in nothing but my underwear.

I'm wide awake at this point and decide to go ahead and get the day started. I check my phone to see if BL or the Congressman texted me letting me know where they were at. Much to my surprise, 22 text messages. 14 missed phone calls. Only 2 of those text messages were from BL and CG, letting me know they were either on their way to the airport, or they made their connecting flight. The rest were from that Canadian girl I met at Tryst the previous night (no, not the same girl that wanted me to take her to pound town while her husband watched). All 14 missed calls were from her as well. The text messages ranged from "Some asshole just stepped on my toe!" "where could we find some cocaine?!" "Room service at the Mirage tastes like crap!". I barely knew this girl and I got bombarded like that. I feel sorry for poor saps that give their number to her from this point forward. My guess is she got some cocaine but just not a good batch? anywho. I hop in the shower, get dressed, pack, and do the express checkout on the TV as we'll be staying at the Golden Nugget for the remainder of the trip. I head downstairs, check my bag with the bellman, and head to a restaurant where I would absolutely punish Bally's on their all-you-can-eat $6.95 buffet. Wasn't the best in the world, but it got the job done.

It's about 10 AM now so I grab my bags and cab it over to the airport to meet BL and CG. I arrive and CG is already there. We shake hands, introduce ourselves, shoot the breeze for a second while waiting for his bags. BL calls me and tells me his flight from LAX is delayed so we can just head over to the hotel as he won't be there until later in the afternoon. We all met at the airport because we wanted to catch a limo over to the Golden Nugget together, and I hadn't seen BL in a long time so I was a bit anxious. Me and CG grab a cab, and start heading downtown. The cab driver we had was cool as can be, and even let me smoke in his cab. He's telling us all kinds of crazy stories that involve strippers, prostitutes, drugs, and other X-rated stuff that l'll leave off of here. In the midst of that, my phone rings with BL calling again. Turns out his flight got cancelled not long after he got off the phone with me due to mechanical issues, and the next flight wouldn't be leaving LAX until 2 AM. not exactly the way we wanted to start our trip. Me and CG had agreed to meet him at the airport when his flight arrives in a drunken stupor. As soon as I got off the phone with him, it dawned on me. Los Angeles can't be that far from Vegas. I look it up, 4 or 5 hours. Why not just rent a car and drive over?! I called him back to suggest that, and have the airline give up your seat and just pay for a rental car. Sure enough, it worked. American Airlines agreed to that, and rented him a Mustang Convertible to make the drive over.

We arrive at the Golden Nugget, pay the fare (but not before getting a flyer from the cabbie advertising girls that'll come to your room and give you a nice dose of herpes). Like the business card given to me from the crazed lawyer, it got chunked. Walking around the property, you could tell the place has seen some better days, but it had a cool vibe and didn't seem as douchey as some areas of the Strip. We go check in, but not before I go to the sports book to place a $20 bet on the Louisiana-Arkansas college football game that'll take place the following day. "We've got this. Back-to-back bowl champs, our guys had a great offseason, and Arkansas is rebuilding..we're gonna beat the brakes off of them in Fayetteville" I'm thinking to myself as I hand over the money and get the ticket.

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Louisiana ended up losing 34-14 by the way, just in case you were wondering.

We get to the check in desk, and beforehand, all 3 of us booked 3 different rooms in the Rush Tower (which was the Golden Nuggets newest hotel tower, finished in 2010 I believe) I hand the clerk a $20 sandwich, I give her the names on all 3 reservations, and politely ask her if she can put all of our rooms next to each other. "Certainly, sir" she said with a smile. She asked the clerk next to her what room CG was in (as he was checking in), and she ended up getting all 3 of our rooms side by side. Winning. Me and CG head up to our respective rooms, and like I do in any other hotel room I check into, I do a swan dive on to the bed I'll be (hardly) sleeping on for the next 4 nights.

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It's so comfortable that I really don't want to get up..but to hell with sleep, I'll do that when I get home. I throw on my swim trunks and we head down to the pool for a little bit of day-drinking. The pool area is actually really cool. Perfect for grabbing a tube and floating around endlessly all day. There's blackjack tables with gorgeous girls in bikinis dealing. Couple of different bar areas, and a lot of the women there are easy on the eyes. A few kids, but I somewhat expected that since we weren't on the strip. There's no available lounge chairs, so we head up the rooftop pool (otherwise known as the Hideaway Lounge) and pay $20 for a lounge chair. I didn't mind it as it was 18 & up, not as crowded, and way more relaxed. For the remainder of the day, we sat around, drinking beers and chain smoking cigarettes with this older Canadian couple next to us who was cool as shit. We also made it a point to call BL and rub it in his face that we were poolside, getting tipsy while he was fighting traffic to get here. We're assholes, I know. At about 5 PM, we decide to head out, shower and change, and get ready for the night ahead. 7 PM comes rolling around and we're starving, so we head down to this Italian restaurant and chow down. Relatively priced, good food, and excellent service. While we are eating, we bare witness to some lady cursing out a slot machine. I mean, hardcore cursing. C-word and all. Security comes up and she yells out "I'M A JEHOVAH'S WITNESS, YOU CAN'T TOUCH ME!". Sure enough, she ends up getting escorted out. Thanks for the lolz! We end up leaving and decided to see what the Freemont Street Experience is all about. Grab some $3 tall beers from Binion's, check out the street performers, and nearly go into the Glitter Gulch strip club (we end up going on the next night, very bad idea). I feel my phone vibrating and you guessed it..a text from BL. "I'M HERE MOTHER FUCKERS!".

CONTINUING STORY IN VERY NEXT POST..

[Gumbo_Techno]

I immediately call him and he informs me that he's at the hotel, checking in. In a near sprint, I race over there to go see him. Upon seeing him, we exchange a big brotherly hug. Haven't seen him in about a year and a half, almost 2 years. Couldn't tell you how excited I was that our 3rd partner in crime finally made it. "Next time, I'm taking a direct flight from Seattle. None of that layover at LAX nonsense!" he tells me. He gets checked in, we make it up to his room and chill for a bit while he gets showered and changes up. I order a few beers via room service (I've always wanted to do that), we take a shot dedicated to the crazy weekend ahead of us, and we go on our way.

We get back down to the Fremont Street Experience, and are simply in awe at the lightshow and video show that's taking place on the ceiling (if you've been down there, you'll know what I'm talking about). We start wondering around again when the following ensues:

BL: S, I'm feeling The D
Me: wait..you're what?
BL: I'm feeling The D!
Me: you serious?
BL: Yes! I'm feeling it big time man
Me: dude, I've known you for over 10 years and I wou-
BL: No, you dumbass! I think we should go to The D Casino and play some craps! I think we'll get VERY lucky.

Ohhhhhhhh, got ya chief. We take BL's advice in stirde and make our way over to The D and scope the place out. There's a section called "The Party Pit" that's playing a lot of good music from the 90's and early 2000's. "That table right there" BL says and points to a table with spots open for the three of us. We get to the table, each buy in for $200, and place our bets. We went through about 3 cold shooters, then myself, and I was starting to question BL's decision making privileges for the duration of the weekend..until the dealer slid him the dice with the stick. "Buckle up, gents".I placed a $10 bet on the pass line..first roll was a 7, which was a winner since there was no point established yet. Next roll...YO ELEVEN! Another winner. Next roll, 7. Already up $30 with no point established. Next roll is a four the easy way, so I place my odds and throw down $12 on 6. BL looks at me and says "no no, place bets on all the numbers. I promise you, it'll be good". I place $12 in 6, and $10 on the remainder of the numbers. Cocktail waitress comes up, we 3 order Michelobs, and while she's getting our drinks, it's balls to the wall. 6. 8, the hardway. 9. 9 again. 5. 4 the easy way. Cocktail waitress comes back with our drinks and we each tip her $10, you know, for good karma. For what felt like forever, it was one thing after another. Winning, winning, winning. I drop $100 in the field, feeling ballsy, and sure enough, outs comes a 12, which pays triple. $300 in my pocket off of one roll. Hell yes. His roll finally comes to an end, but not after coloring up and cashing out with $1000. Kept pressing our bets, and it paid off with a hot shooter. I must say, that's the most fun I've ever had playing craps, and probably gambling in general..not just because we were winning, but because the atmosphere was a lot fun with the music, the vibe, the dancing dealers and all.

We left and did some more people watching down Fremont Street. Walked by The Golden Nugget, and got a voucher for free cover and a free drink for Gold Diggers, the club/lounge inside of the Golden Nugget. Free drink and no cover..what do we have to lose by checking this place out? We had a drink, scoped out the crowd (which was just weird), and decided to bounce after not even being in there for 10 minutes. BL getting turned down for a dance was pretty much what sealed the deal on us leaving. We start roaming around aimlessly and somehow end up near the El Cortez. The building looked VERY deteriorated, but what the hell..we're already here, may as well go see what it's all about. It was very old and could use a complete remodel from the inside out, but other than that, we enjoyed our time there. The crowd in there was mostly middle aged to older folks, so it was a bit quiet, and every worker we came across was very friendly, from the dealers to security to the ladies working in the cashiers cage.

We decide to go to the craps table for some more action, and ended up winning $100 more. In the middle of our roll, CG tells us he's going to the bathroom. We finish up 15 minutes later, still no sign of CG. We were in a sketchy part of town so needless to say we were a little worried. My heart is racing at this point as I start to get genuinely worried. We're calling and texting him nonstop, to no avail. We are wandering around in a frenzy trying to find him, when out of nowhere he pops up with a hot dog in his hand. "I went outside to get something to eat!" he says. Took everything I had in me to not knock that hotdog out of his hands. Turns out his phone died and he couldn't find us at the craps table. Grrr....

As we're walking out, we all agree on heading over to Drai's. We cab it over to Bally's, get in the non-existent line (it was 2 AM and to my understanding, people don't start coming until roughly 4 or so), I pay cover for 3 people at $30/each (since I somewhat dragged them out here, I figured I'd get the cover). The cover charge was a bit steep, but as soon as we walked in and heard the DJ doing his thing, it was worth every penny to me. In Louisiana, we don't have much of an electronic music scene, so anytime I get to hear this kind of music in a club, I'm swooning big time. We sit at a table, order a bucket of beers and just relax....until, out of nowhere, the resident DJ (Fabian Arche, come to find out) drops one of my favorite tunes.. Mark Knight- Your Love. We all got up and just started jamming out on the dance floor, along with the other 3 people that were there too. Massive tune on a massive sound system, I was in heaven. BL and CG decide to head to the other room where they're playing top 40/hip-hop, while I'm just jamming away. I head over to the bathroom, and on my way back, I'm being approached by this gorgeous girl with a smile like the Grinch. She comes up and says "OH MY GOD! ANDREW!!!! HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?!". Uhh..my name's not Andrew. I have no clue who this girl is, or who she thinks I am. I decide to play along just for the lolz.

Me: I've been excellent! How are you?
Random Girl: Ohhh I've been great!!! I would have never expected to run into you in Vegas! It's been so long!
Me: Uhh yeah it's crazy where life can bring us at times!
Random Girl: Are you still at Penn State?! They must be feeding you good up there, I see you gained a little bit of weight!
(thanks bitch! I mean, really?!)
Me: Oh um yeah yeah..the food up there is extravagant and yes, I'm getting ready to graduate!
Random Girl: Awesome!! Good for you!!! Let's go get a drink! My treat!

We head to the bar and grab a drink. I gladly took her up on her offer. We talk and joke around for a second, when out of nowhere..she says "You're not really Andrew are you? You're not who I think you are?". I insist that I am, when she asks me what happened to the tattoo on my neck. "Laser removal, sister". She asks "what's my name then?!". Being the smart ass I am, I reply with "Obamaniqua". She then proceeds to call me a few bad names, shoots me the middle finger, and storms off. BL and CG come walking back up, wondering what happened, so I tell them. They laugh, I laugh, we order more shots, a couple of more beers, and everything beyond that is a blur. Last thing I remember was leaving Drai's. Mind you, me and CG had been drinking since 2 PM that previous afternoon. We were hammered..won a little bit of money..got cursed out by some random girl. The night was an overall success.

Coming up: Why CG got his name, a bathrobe and a hamburger, hookers at Rehab, and bribery: the spirit of Las Vegas.

[Max Woodpecker]

awesome job at the craps table

[tony67]

Man I hope I can get a lucky shooter like that in a few days! Good report.