"Dancers", NSA Agents,Do You Play Basketball?, Miss Iowa and Gypsies...

[BarrelO]

Geez. This is like a real-life Cinemax movie.

[dnix]

Nice. I recognize her. She was on the WPBA a few years back.

[Cirilo Medina]

Wow! Just wow! And yes the upper echelon is far worse then the mid-to-high class as far as partying. They just get away with more!

[Brooklyn Marc]

4/28/14 continued:

I finally realize that its somewhat late and i have yet to figure our where i am supposed to be headed later that night with my new conference friends. Also i am looking forward to seeing my new female companion who drank all of my Macallan throughout the day. I give a call and realize that this mansion is nowhere near the strip and begin to regret the commitment i made to go in the first place. I debate whether i should do a club solo (but figure with no bottle service set up etc. it'll be weak and though still sober, well on my way to legendary drunk status), decide i might as well be around some fun people who realize how much i have been drinking and also have a place to crash if i pass out (rarely happens but i was WELL on my way to drinking more than i had in years, and coming from what i'll just call a "seasoned" drinker that's quite a statement). I am completely unaware of what i am about to get myself into...

I hop in a cab and give the lady the address (it is NOWHERE near the strip is what i soon realize but fuck it), after driving for what seems like an hour (more like 30 if i had to guess) i pull up to the house. I vaguely recall throwing some bills at the cab driver, her looking at me like i was nuts, trying to give me some back(which in hindsight is never a good sign) and me literally yelling at her to take it (ah well merry Christmas).I WILL say this right now, this was one of the nicest houses i've been in in a while (and i went to high school with actual Kennedy kids, yeah those KENNEDY'S), and even with all the drinking i've been doing i am thinking this is a complete waste of money as most of the people who are inside are technically employees of various state governments although on the Pension management side. That thought passes me as fuck it it ain't my money and spend it if you can. Now i don't know whose house this hedge fund was renting but in all honesty it looked like someone was trying to get on an episode of MTV cribs or some shit... just excessive. Like the dude who owned it told the architect "two of everything" type shit. For example why have one big ass pool when two is better? Pool table?Fuck that Nah Man; Pool Hall! (which would come into play when i got hustled by my new lady friend later), in short just a house out of something like Scarface or something.

Speaking of Scarface, once inside it become clear just what kind of party this was going to be. To put it bluntly as i have mentioned before if your reading this and live in certain large U.S states and work for the government you REALLY don't want to know what people who handle your potential retirement do in their free time. There were tons of lets just call them "stimulants" available (if your into that type of thing) including what looked like something like a brick of something seen on episodes of The Wire. I'm cool with the full bar (though i would kill for a joint, does NO ONE smoke weed in these circles?), and commence to drinking as its been roughly 45 minutes to an hour since my last drink and i am ashamed of that realization. I go looking for my new friends and find them out by the pool chilling and shooting the shit. They seemed stunned that i went back to the bar after they had left and i began to wonder internally if i am a bit of a problem drinker (this too passes fuck it LOL.)My female companion is looking pretty good in just a simple black dress and sandals and hair pulled back and also to my surprise my new lady friend has a joint and i become even more smitten as i take my first pull in Vegas and all is right with the world as i proceed to smoke all of her joint (payback for the Macallan!, which price wise she got the better end of that deal and being a trader she accepts that logic).

Now completely loosened up, i take advantage of the open bar and the amenities of the house. They had a DJ dude set up and though he wasn't famous (shit nowadays who knows? i consider my musical tastes eclectic but there are DJ's i have never heard of that make 100's of thousands a show), BUT he WAS very good from what i recall and had ACTUAL turntables which i recall being blown away by considering the Mac Book state of DJ'ing nowadays. In any event it was a good time and my new friends and i thoroughly enjoy the people watching as a bunch of coked up 40 something financial professionals try to keep the beat to classic Biggie and Pac songs! My little crew is remembered by most in attendance for actually bringing some energy to what was a boring as fuck conference and i actually can justify the surreal experience i am having in this house; because in hindsight i made a shit ton of contacts and generated some business when i got back home. VEGAS: Where acting like an ass, getting drunk, meeting women, and drugs= BUSINESS (a new slogan perhaps? your welcome Vegas tourism board). Also worth a mention, there are an inordinate amount of good looking women at this party. It is clear that they are NOT financial professionals, they are NOT dressed like financial professionals, but they are of course in THE profession. To be honest being quite a bit younger than a lot of my colleagues at work i have only heard stories of the so called "good old days" in finance. The days when a trip to a strip club with clients were considered routine, or providing "entertainment" was just part of doing business, so to me seeing a party like this where it was so blatant was like seeing the "Thriller" video for the first time; just a revelation. I honestly didn't think shit like this still went on and am genuinely excited to observe. It is truly amazing the things you find out about people when you party with them, the most buttoned up looking dude can change at the blink of an eye in a club or party. I know through absolutely NO prompting of my own i had some fairly rich old white guys tell me shit that if they remembered in the morning they will have trouble looking me in the eye... and the amount of people who partook in the hookers...just wow, i wouldn't want to be the cleaning service after that hedge fund handed back the keys man.

In any event, my alcohol consumption continues and i am viewed as a golden god for showing no signs of letting up, but here is the thing about me and being drunk. It doesn't manifest itself in stumbling, or even passing out; it shows in the decisions i make and they are highly questionable to put it mildly. As mentioned this house had a little pool hall type room with various tables and i and my new friends happen upon the room. The thing about most financial professionals is that they tend to be gamblers and traders are the WORST kind, i am no different. This being the case i immediately (and loudly) start challenging people to 100 dollar games and have no problems finding takers. I am good at pool, am more than good at pool seeing as how my grandfather owned a pool hall back in the day (when owning a pool hall was something you could make a living at, though i suspect he did other things out of said pool hall, another story for another time), but as the saying goes there is ALWAYS someone better. In my case turns out my lady friend was that person. In hindsight i should have realized this as A)by the time she came back and offered to play, she had went to her room and COMPLETELY changed clothes and looked WAY more comfortable and B) the other two guys in our group had pooled together their cash to let her play me for 500 dollars (which is what i had won at that point). I am man enough to admit that i let alcohol and sexism cloud my judgment. In a game of nine ball with her breaking first she damn near ran the table and that was 500 bucks down the drain. In any event lesson learned and somehow i am even more attracted to her at this point! I was certainly pretty turned up but not stupid (or dunk) enough to do anther game. For some reason i still think of all the OTHER gambling i could have done with that easy 500 (i might have a problem with gambling i think).

In any event the party rages on (even though EVERYONE in attendance has to be at the Cosmo for the conference at around 8 in the morning) and starts to die down around maybe 3 or 4 (i don't know man i could barely read my watch at that point) and i am rewarded for losing 500 bucks by being invited to sleep over with my new lady friend. In some weird kind of way losing that cash was well worth it i suppose... overall a very good night in Vegas...

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[dapadon]

Man I don't know how you can drink THAT much and remember THAT much detail over THAT long a period in Vegas... But I'm glad you could!!! lol Great TR so far!

[AusVIP]

the amount of detail in this is incredible!!! Sets a new standard for trip reporting IMO. Will be reading this one over again before/on my way to vegas next time lol.

[Brooklyn Marc]

4/28/14: Continued

Urgh i am starting to regret committing to finishing this damn thing. Lol.

I get back to my room and immediately realize its WAY too early to have gone back to my room. After the previous fiasco of Sunday when i fell asleep for roughly 14 hours i get nervous and decide to head back over to the Cosmo again until my conference friends are ready to start partying over at the rented mansion. Still suited up, sorta buzzed and looking to party i head back up to the Chandelier Bar again and run into the linoleum salesmen/women i met earlier. They for some reason are fucking ECSTATIC to see me and immediately start ordering rounds for us. Welll okay. I don't know where this whole situation is leading but i like how it starts. The linoleum crew mostly consisted of a brother and sister pair and another dude, myself and a roatating cast of people who got pulled into our don't give a fuck vibe. The female member of the crew was by far one of the best wing men i have ever had, just a really cool chick who was out to party. Oh yeah and she was around 5'11, large and had purple streaks in her hair.just a Vegas character all the way. Anyway, for whatever reason i had it my head that this would be the night in which i drank as much as i could handle. Without bragging this is ALOT and usually spells trouble for everyone else involved.

So we are all in agreement that we will go round for round pretty much without any pauses, and if we met somebody we liked we pulled them into the debauchery too. In any event we met some interesting characters including me loudly proclaiming that i was going to get the brother half of the crew laid. Lets just say i had my work cut out for me. I believe there is a thread somewhere on the forums regarding proper pool attire and somebody wanted to know if Cargo short were acceptable... well this dude was wearing Cargo shorts at one of the nicer bars in Vegas with some of the most done up women in Vegas (deep breath and sigh). I'm ALL for causal, i'm of the belief you can wear zebra stripes with fucking polka dots if you do it confidently. Good dude but he was NOT one of those guys. Eventually we run into an older well preserved woman and her younger employee and strike up a pretty good conversation. I do my duty as a wing man and try my best to give the Cliff Paul (the assist) so i continue to chat up the older woman while he does what he can on his end. During this period i am getting a little concerned because i am getting the distinct impression that my conversation partner is liking the cut of my jib and i might have to commit further than i EVER intended. Its looking like a done deal on his end and i am genuinely excited for him (though ready to shit a chicken at the unexpected turn my night might take), when she starts to actively start using her smart phone a little too much and i KNOW before he realizes that his window just closed. Soon enough she gives mine the signal and they use the excuse of having a "early day" (though mine slides me her card and her room number before leaving), and crisis averted on my end and i vow to leave him to his own devices for the rest of the night.

We continue drinking and my wing woman pulls into the group just a FANTASTIC looking chick who just carries herself in a certain WAY (if that makes sense) and i make it my mission (fueled by brown liquid courage) to make her fall for my "charms". Which is to say i hope she thinks i'm a nice guy as i have very little game to speak of. Luckily my wing woman does an amazing job of making me seem like i am the absolute TITS (shit in my head she had ME wanting to take me home) and we do the whole life story thing. Turns out she carries herself in a certain "Way" because she has a lot of things going on. I find out she is in town because she plays the Violin in Celine Dionne's band, (i mention that i feel terrible for her having to listen to that titanic song several nights a year and she nearly spit out her drink as it turns out she plays the fucking violin on that record), has won a grammy, has her own band and oh yeah was once MISS IOWA. I'm feeling a little out of my element here but she seems to genuinely be interested. I have NEVER been as happy to be wearing a suit in Vegas as that night. Lol. Anyway she actually DOES have an early morning but we exchange numbers i get a kiss when walking her to the elevators and set up a night for dinner while we are both in town.

Of course this victory requires more drinking and i even get a few high fives from some folks who have joined out little crew during the time all of this was taking place. As i mentioned before matching me drink for drink does not end well for some folks and actually one of the linoleum sales men cats has completely passed out in the little lounge chairs the have around the bar and i wonder if i have caused the death of a random linoleum kingpin in Vegas. If so it'll be just another story to share with the dudes at work, but no he is just severely drunk and we proceed to take pics of his shame to preserve his weakness as a human being. My new friends unfortunately didn't take to my completely serious suggestion that we do things with him "weekend at Bernie's Style" and document it to put it on youtube and do the responsible thing and drag his ass back to their room. Considering that it was a non bottle service night at a bar we did some serious damage bar tab wise (to the point when i got back and submitted my expense report i got screamed at by my managing director, but fuck him if he can't take a joke), but was WELL worth it in my book. Also i still had some partying to do at the Mansion that night so more to come...

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[Brooklyn Marc]

Fantastic trip report! Spent a good part of my day at work reading through this haha. Reading awesome TR's like this just gets me amped for my upcoming trip. Also, I might have to stop on my way home tonight and pick up a bottle of single malt! Haha

Lol now imagine actually WRITING it, and i still have 3 days left lol. I appreciate the love and yeah that was the point of writing it. There was a real lack of reports for a while and happy that its getting folks hyped for their own trips and hopefully they'll share their funny moments too. Tip a glass to me tonight and I'll do the same man!

[KinStock77]

Fantastic trip report! Spent a good part of my day at work reading through this haha. Reading awesome TR's like this just gets me amped for my upcoming trip. Also, I might have to stop on my way home tonight and pick up a bottle of single malt! Haha

[SuZQ]

I don't know the rules... But I think its okay.

[kman90]

i could EASILY start another TR from this Austria trip as it coincided with 3 things 1. My brothers wedding (he plays ball there and so the women at his wedding were INCREDIBLE Austria has some sneaky hot women) 2. They have this crazy AIDS fundraiser there called the "life ball" that a bunch of famous people and models from all over the world go to and somehow my brother got invited and took me too (Again just a CRAZY night) 3. Start of the world cup (which to me i could care less but Europeans love soccer), so when i say i got HAMMERED a few nights i mean legendarily so! !

Let me go to the judges SuZQ and TaraDenise:
Ladies...What are the rulez for starting a non-Vegas (Austria) TR while still in mid-Vegas TR incomplete status?
Is it doable? Will we become dazed and confused? and will we begin to hate BrooklynMarc as we already hate Flo and Dnix in a Kanye hating JayZ kinda way? Guess its all good then.

Funny how there was this quiet peace and no TR's for like 6 months...and then boom! And non-stop yet entertaining read from TR professionals.

I have 16 days before my boring not BMarc-ish, Flo-ish, Dnix-ish Vegas trip.

[Brooklyn Marc]

This report was great at Macallan 18. Turned to epic at Macallan 25. If we get to Macallan 30 I won't have a score high enough to grade it lol

You KNOW i was on the hunt for it, but i have rarely seen many bars carry it. I'm not gonna lie i did it once when i was in Miami and even i had to pause at the up charge most bars charge for the 30. However if it was available during that trip i probably would have started up drinking it, just the type of trip that called for it. Lol.

[Brooklyn Marc]

under my breath I whisper "fuk you Marc" as you pen more of your TR from fuckin Austria...which somehow could lead to a trip report within a trip report... this is some krazy Inception level shit...how many levels down are you taking us?
Waiting for more ...where is my hater's lounge chair.

You literally just made me laugh out loud on that one. And you are absolutely right, i could EASILY start another TR from this Austria trip as it coincided with 3 things 1. My brothers wedding (he plays ball there and so the women at his wedding were INCREDIBLE Austria has some sneaky hot women) 2. They have this crazy AIDS fundraiser there called the "life ball" that a bunch of famous people and models from all over the world go to and somehow my brother got invited and took me too (Again just a CRAZY night) 3. Start of the world cup (which to me i could care less but Europeans love soccer), so when i say i got HAMMERED a few nights i mean legendarily so! But given the amount of time it takes to write 10 days in Vegas i'll focus on finishing this one. Will get the next part up later today!

[kman90]

under my breath I whisper "fuk you Marc" as you pen more of your TR from fuckin Austria...which somehow could lead to a trip report within a trip report... this is some krazy Inception level shit...how many levels down are you taking us?
Waiting for more ...where is my hater's lounge chair.

[Cirilo Medina]

This story just keeps getting better with age. Like the Macallen